Now im quite a bit better.

I'm toast without a stimulant. I seriously was going to sleep on the floor at my moms work like I always did before in class.. I kept closing my eyes in the middle of typing, Doesn't contribute to psychosis. But caffeine does. I want it to last longer. There was a loss of hope.

Why?: When I'm not on a stimulant, I believe that the Concerta could not possibly make such a dramatic change and I will stay like that forever. It's horrible. I'm showing this post to my psychiatrist. I don't have to go through this. All they need to do is allow me to take 3 or even 2.5 and not 2. They are afraid that I'll get psychosis.

As I said, when I'm better, I really am. Taking my meds prescribed, no plans on stopping them except the caffeine (which gives me the tremors but they don't believe me whatever). I don't want to have a heart attack. I only take them because they mix well with Concerta and I'm young. Not 80

I texted my dad and said some weird things when I was stressed about my mom controlling me and he has connections with god and I don't even believe in god. He sent it to my mom to help me but she sent it to my psychologist.

With or without Concerta, I will still get stressed and think irrationally in delusional paranoid ways from time to time.

I really believe that there will be much much better treatment starting where I live. The Muslims won't be a problem where I live. There's propaganda as fake news, they want attention I don't know it's messed up but it will be very cold here.

The oil sands production in my Provence is what fuels the economy here. That's why I get good treatment. They increased disability by 400 dollars in 2011. I'm so thankful of where I live. They're all rednecks but they're rich and better educated.

Pension for the elderly is 500 dollars. If you're a refugee, you get 2200 a month and 800 more if you have a child. I would rather die than to convert to Islam. If I become a minority in my own country, I'll be the terrorist.

I would love to be a politician. I love using my math skills for something that is useful instead of just yknow some human calculater. Money, people, culture, languages and traveling the world are a dream for me.

If my mom thinks I'm delusional, I'm going to figure it out. I will never believe what someone else believes when I'm insulted like that.

If it wasn't for Concerta, I wouldn't have typed this at all. I don't know why people complain about psychoactive stimulants. I don't know why people just mind their own business.

I'm going to write quite a bit and present it to my mom in my logic and proof that I'm very sane, doing well and that I'm right about me. I'm medicated and If my psychologist agrees with her that it can't drive incase I do something bad, I did it before and I'll do it again. Drivers lisence or not.