Hello paradox22, you have enough insight to realise what is going on, this is where you can start to make changes. You've recognised the abuser and the effects it's had and having on you, now the next step is to share with those you trust to get out of it and start making those changes for a better life. It may take some time but the strength is within you.
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Pegasus
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“Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by it's ability to climb a tree, it will live it's whole life believing that it is stupid.” - Albert Einstein