She used to ask me a question like what I'm thinking. She didn't let the silence go on for to long. But she want me to talk more in therapy and she wants me to ''take the lead''. A few sessions ago there was a very long silence. She wanted me to start talking about something and when I asked if I don't say anything all session, will you stay silent the whole session and she said yes. I so don't like that. I get why she does this, but ugh!
And today there fell a silence and I got nervous, looked at her and she said that she waited until I say something. I said that I couldn't think about something to say, but she said that I should think of something, anything. This makes me so nervous. And this will occur more often. When there will be a silence she probably won't end it, but will wait until I say something. It's going to be really hard for me.

And what I dislike so much is that she would just stare at me. Pdoc does that too. I think most T's do that. They just stare at you, make you very uncomfortable until you can't take it anymore and will say something. Or walk away. I get why they keep looking at me, if they would look in an other direction it can seem like they aren't interested in me. But still I so don't like it. It makes me so nervous that I can't think of anything to say.