I'm really not that afraid of ECT. Less than I ever thought I'd be. The biggest anxiety is whether they'll approve it and figuring out what med will work afterward since I have so few choices. (I've been through all the APs that I can afford that are lower risk for EPS and I've had EPS enough times that when there is a risk of it I'm likely to have it. My pdoc is considering 2 brand new APs but one has a really high risk of EPS and the other isn't approved for bipolar depression and is related to Abilify which was a disaster of a med with akathesia and blood pressure problems that made me fall a bunch.

It helps that they do a lot of ECT where I go to the hospital and so I've seen a lot of people going through it and I know the drs. and are comfortable with them. I dread being in the hospital for a long time but I know that keeps me safer and also is the only way I can afford it.

But I still don't even know if that will happen. If my AD is working better I may avoid it but today I don't feel that tiny lift I felt yesterday so who knows. I have been hungry yesterday and today for the first time in months. Not starving but willing to eat. Unfortunately the thing I most want to eat is at the store not home....

Good luck to you Coco. I'll be interested in how it is going. I think that they'll wait until my next appointment to decide about ECT (or it will be month to month until we are sure nothing else is going to do anything; we have some potential last ditch things that I don't think will be useful to try but maybe one will work and stick. That's what hasn't been happening the last 9 months). I don't know. I just want something to work. ECT has about a 50% chance from what I read, probably less because of my lack of med options when it is done.

I'll do virtually anything right now.