yeah, the diabetes thing scared me. i have a friend who is a pharmacist and he said i should be wary of it if i have any history of diabetics in my family and there are a LOT. personally, i am very, very tiny as are most people in my family until they get to be about my age and they gain weight. my blood sugar levels are usually bordering on the hypoglycemic levels which is scary because that can also lead to diabetes. i decided not to take the med anyway. i talked to the pdoc last night and he's mad at me now AGAIN. i don't like him. i don't know what to do though. he's already plotting new drugs for me to take. he's leaning towards risperidol (sp?) which i hear can mess up your hormones which i also have a problem with. i hate him sometimes. i will not take that. i want him to try to help me without these stupid poisons.

also, he keeps wanting me to do this stupid meditation video.... i hate meditation and always have. i don't know what else to do though that would satisfy him though.

i feel trapped and don't know where to go.