Wow. So I've been in some form of treatment since age 12. I'm 37 now. My dx's have been: depression, bipolar, ptsd, borderline, schizoaffective, and now this. Medically I have severe migraines and mild seizures.

I feel that mental health-wise, I am only getting worse. I don't think any of the treatment has really ever helped, it's almost in the same way that jail makes a better criminal, treatment makes a sicker patient. On my end, I am dramatic and obtuse.

If someone could help me make sense of this or offer insight I'd appreciate it. I guess the only diagnoses that feel correct to me are ptsd, depression and yes I do dissociate but I'm only aware after. I don't have fully separate alters but my husband says I change when I dissociate. My voice, the look on my face, the music I listen to, the way I dress.