So glad to hear you are communicating better and really connecting, gerber. Awesome!

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i told him that when he says i did well with a situation, i instantly feel like i really shouldn't be in therapy

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Oh yeah, I know that feeling. Very early on in therapy, my T told me that I am better than 90% of the people who walk through his door, and I immediately felt threatened, like he didn't think I needed to be there, and that I should give up my place on his client list to someone more needy. It took me a long time to be able to ask him about this, and I needed reassurance on it several times. It turns out what he meant was not that I didn't need his help, but that from the start I was very honest with him, very direct, and it was a joy to communicate like that with me right off the bat, instead of having to work a long time in therapy to achieve that honesty and directness. Yeah, that made me feel better, but in times of doubt, I would return to that "better than 90%" comment and get insecure again. (Note to T: do not tell a client they are better off than most of your other clients...)

Anyway, gerber, I am so happy for you that therapy is going so well and your T is learning what you need from him. He sounds very empathetic and interested in helping you.