Sounds like you've met some truly awful women in your past - Im sorry you've experienced that, and Im glad you appreciate that the vast majority of us are decent people!

As for me - I resent all people. Gender makes no difference to me. Lets face it, I wouldn't be on this forum if I should be on the cover of Sanity Fair!

I have tried a variety of tactics to explain myself with men - none have been amazingly successful. At the end of the day - rejecting someone is never going to be a fun experience. To be honest, no, in the beginning I was not up front. This was far from being cruel - I was trying to protect the guys, trying not to hurt them and I was worried that being totally up front would hurt them more. I realised pretty quickly though, that the message was not getting through (unsurprisingly!).

I have a lot of male friends - I get on with guys much easier than I get on with girls. Unfortunately, what happened was that guys would misinterpret me seeing them as really great friends, as me being interested in them. In my eyes, we were just hanging out having a laugh. I was one of the lads. In their eyes - romance was blossoming. As soon as I would realise what was happening, I would try and stop it - but I would try and do it 'nicely' and the guys just never got the hint.

So after a while, I changed tactic. I would be completely up front. My line of choice is that 'I just don't feel the magic', or 'that chemistry just isn't there for me'. You're probably wondering why I don't say 'I don't have sex, I don't want you or anyone else'. Well, I have said that once or twice. But usually, I don't say it, because its not true.

I've been celibate a long time, I enjoy this and am comfortable with this. However, I have not ruled out ever having a relationship ever again. I just genuinely haven't met anyone I feel that chemistry with. If I did meet someone I wanted to take things further with - I would. The reason I am rejecting a guy is not because 'I don't have sex' - Its because I just don't fancy him. Im just not attracted to them. They might be the most wonderful, fabulous people that I love hanging out with - but that special something thats needed to progress the relationship to something romantic just is not there. Thats not anyones' fault, and theres certainly no thought in my mind that there is something wrong with the guy - I just don't fancy them.

Like I say - guys' reactions have varied. One guy I was very honest with, and who had known about my celibacy from the start of our friendship - took it rather badly, turned in to a complete psychopath and the police had to get involved. Another guy slit his wrists. Another guy is still my friend, and thinks he is gonna 'turn' me. And many others have continued to be my wonderful, fabulous, plutonicly loved best friends who I am privileged to have in my life.

It sounds like you have met some very cruel women in the past - but sometimes people get hurt, and its no ones fault, and no one did anything wrong - its just one of those things.