back when the two of you were constant companions, why were you? i mean - why did you participate in that? i'll speculate that needs of yours were being met by having that relationship with your friend. and visa-versa i'm sure. call me a pessimist but even altruism is an illusion. people who put themselves on the line for others are not doing so selflessly - they're doing it because it makes them feel good about themselves.

obviously, i'm not in the know about very many of the details of the relationship you have with this person, but from what you have shared i can see that the one who spurned you has a lot in common with myself - 'illness'-wise. except that i don't fib about my degree of social impairment. it's quite apparent that the condition is disabling because in this very social world we live in, she's not being very sociable...except online. i'm not often very sociable either...except online, where i have absolute control as to when in in what manner my social interactions take place. if i don't have that sort of control over my personal reality, %#@&#! can start to fall apart in a hurry.

and lastly, (mostly because i've been awake for 28 hours after having been asleep for 16), i'm reminded of and excerpt from a televised psychology course that used to come on late on public telelvision in a place i used to live -

the situation... psychotherapist and therapee

therapee: "but i'm afraid that if i reject him, he'll be hurt."

therapist: " by merely rejecting him, you can't hurt him - that's voodoo. if he's hurt by your rejection of him, that's all on him. he is choosing to feel bad about it. you didn't make him do it."

end excerpt

in short, do your thing and let her do hers .

that is all