I am more isolated now than ever before. I go to work, pick my kids up after work and then isolate myself the rest of the night. On my days off I can not even bring myself to leave the house. I put on a great mask at work- my brave face...all is good in my world face and it is exhausting. I am working on some heavy stuff with my therapist right now, but what I really really feel like I need is to cry...a lot. I have not cried in years. I also dissociate on a regular basis..I have blocked almost all emotion. Everytime I can feel myself getting to a point where I can allow myself to cry I block it off. I just don't feel like I am going to make any progress until I allow myself to have a complete emotional release....I just don't know how to do that! My therapist has cautioned me not to force it and to take it slow so as to not retraumatize myself, but I am so tired of being stuck.