trying to be respectful to myself as well as to my mother while also being an adult and try to earn money for the simple task of wanting to move out is wearing me out. Things have been a lot better between me and my mom as of recently but we clash in opinions about so many different things, and I am just geuinely exasusted from deal with this.

all of this makes me look at myself and feel ashamed not of what I am doing in my life. But over the fact that my family claims they know who I am as person and they honestly don't and if they were to truly know who I was they would probably be ashamed of it.
which feeds into my depression and misery in my life.