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I have all these conflicting feelings about therapy. I trust her and yet, I don't. I like going and yet, I don't. I feel like we have a connection and yet, I don't feel comfortable being completely honest with her. Sometimes, I feel like she's being too nice and the idea of getting too attached to her is a frightening one. She wants to work on my self esteem and to get me to see my worth as a person. She kept talking about all my positive traits and how I'm a remarkable young person but I felt like she was saying all that to be nice.
She told me that she really meant what she said and she's not just being nice because she's my therapist but I find that really hard to believe. I guess it's hard to really believe that someone would genuinely care about me or like me.
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"We deny that we're tired, we deny that we're scared, we deny how badly we want to succeed. And most importantly, we deny that we're in denial. We only see what we want to see and believe what we want to believe, and it works. We lie to ourselves so much that after a while the lies start to seem like the truth. We deny so much that we can't recognize the truth right in front of our faces."
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