I'm sorry you did not receive any replies to this post, bw321. I hope that you were able to overcome the desire to cut the night you posted this. It would, of course, be best if you could overcome your desire to cut entirely. But I know how difficult this can be. So, if you are still cutting please try to do so as safely as possible. I send warm thoughts your way. 
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"I may be older but I am not wise / I'm still a child's grown-up disguise / and I never can tell you what you want to know / You will find out as you go." (from: "A Nightengale's Lullaby" - Julie Last)
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