I know you see nothing wrong with self harming, but that's because you aren't well. Self harming is not a healthy coping method. I hope things will turn around for you. The meds would help a lot (mine really help me). But the rest of it, eating well and exercising, that is good. It would be great if you could replace the self harm with extra exercise. Try to remember the meds are not poison and they would free you from those other entities, and nothing bad would happen.