We are going to my future in laws tonight for dinner and I always have a mask on. And I dread it. Sometimes, though, I cant mask not wanting to talk so they prob think Im a stuck up asshole. Im already an introvert, u couple it with irritation and Im shut down completely or otherwise Id be snapping at stupid comments my future father in law makes. Then id be a *****. So ***** or asshole. But i suppose its still a mask of sorts. So then instead of talking, the whole time we are there I am thinking about all the negatives about these people and how irritated I am that i have to be subject to it, and so on. But i do it with my own family too, lol. My father in law witnessed me snap at my boyfriend one time, which prob shattered his view of me as "easy going and laid back". But no one is always rainbows and unicorns even without mental illness, so...