Ugh, yes I know what you are saying. I saw the warning signs with him when it comes to the caretaking, and yet I tried to keep up my boundaries and make the relationship work on a normal level. I was very consequent about not neglecting my own stuff, like going to my yoga classes, seeing my friends, and so on. When that became stressful because he got jealous, I remember that I often told him that maybe we wanted too different things in life, and that I didn't want to change him, but that things weren't working out for me. But whenever we had this conversation he would start fighting really hard and told me that he would never let me go. I realize NOW how crazy this was. Now that he still refuses to let me go and shows up all the time, and I see how much energy this costs me and how painful it is, it makes me sad to think that I sort of have let him hold me prisoner for a while because I was too afraid of the breakup.