We ALL fall short. Dust yourself off and get off the mat.

It sounds to me (if I am wrong - ignore me) that you have fallen into a trap of looking back on your history and are beating yourself over all your mistakes.

We ALL make mistakes. Clinton, Cosby, you name it - we ALL fall short of glory. So you can choose to beat the hell out of yourself and gain nothing, OR you can move on. Give your history the finger and say I did what I did - and now I CHOOSE to be a better person.

Take pride. You sound like you are ready to be all that you want to be. Your scars only show the growth that you have done.

Best wishes to you.