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Ad Intra
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Member Since Oct 2014
Location: Hyattsville, MD
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Default Oct 13, 2015 at 11:12 AM
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by starfruit504 View Post
I know what you mean. My heart rate skyrockets when I'm triggered.

As far as I know, intrusive thoughts refer to uncontrollable thoughts that pop up in an involuntary way. According to some studies, they don't even have to be negative thoughts, they can be neutral and still bothersome. According to Psychcentral, negative intrusive thoughts happen a lot in anxiety disorder and OCD.

What you describe sounds like you're either voluntarily remembering what happened to you or having an involuntary flashback. Personally it's hard for me to distinguish between my remembering and my flashbacks. Trauma and dissociation clouds it up for me.

When I remember things my father used to do, I'm there again too. I'm standing where I stood back then. I'm hearing and feeling everything I felt in that moment - and it's even more painful now because I was so numb and calloused to it back then - and because today I realize how wrong it all was.

I would bring up this issue with your therapist. Let them know how you feel, explain the frustration you told us about. You're the foremost authority on your experience.
Frankly I just allow her to believe what ever she wants. It's too painful to correct her and like I've said before there are no words, so I'm stuck.
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