Hi Open Eyes,

I had to cry while reading you, thank you so much.

I still don't know much about PTSD technically, but everything you described is really accurate to my case.
The guilt and shame are really overwhelming, I get shivers all day long, and this strange feeling in my stomach and dizziness.

It is completely understandable that professionals are finding it difficult to help me, I understand it also because english is not my mother language either, and I obviously don't want to go in a situation that gets out of control. It's just that I've been waiting for several months, and it gets a bit desperate to look for help and not get it. But I will be patient.

Thank you so much for sharing your experience, that makes things a bit more grounded for me. It is wonderful what you are doing with those animals (I am vegan, so thumbs up for people saving animals), you are a hero.

I honestly don't feel safe where I am right now; I had to quit my job because there was a really bad environment that was causing me to feel even worse, and having no friends here makes me really lonely. It's a complicated set of feelings because they recall to my childhood, and I have never felt save while I was a child and that really makes me want to roll myself in a blanket and stay in a corner.

Thank you so much for your advice, I will put it to good use. I will probably write a few words to myself and read them when it gets too much, and remember that those feelings are not the 'now', that it will go away and things will be better.

Is it possible to work on the guilt on my own? I tried to look for it on the internet but everything seems very vague, nothing very practical. Meditation? Yoga? I have no idea of what I can do on my own on that part... I will work on my patient.

Reading these replies really helps me and I can't say thank you enough.

Stay strong,
dawn