This is probably all the wrong thing to say, but my gut reaction to this question is: who gives a toss if people are mad? And my next reaction is: let people be mad, already!

For 1. being mad is a natural human reaction to a lot of things. Someone being mad at you usually means they care enough about you to have a feeling one way or another. People who don't care, don't get mad. It takes a really Zen enlightened person to never, ever be mad at someone they care about, which brings me to point #2.

2. By constantly asking people if they're mad at you, you're really trying to suppress their expression of madness. You have no idea how they actually feel, because you're telegraphing really strongly 'you are not allowed to be mad at me, I can't handle it'.

3. People probably are mad at you sometimes, and guess what? They get over it. They get over it and they don't leave you. But you might not be aware of this because you're not allowing them to express their anger in the first place, so you don't even know when you've been forgiven something.

People get mad at their cats sometimes, or their cars, people spend a lot of time mad at their spouses. Being annoyed or even angry is a natural part of life, as long as they aren't being abusive or cruel about it, you've nothing to fear.