I apologies in advance if what I'm going to say upset someone usually I have that affect on people but I hope there's somebody out there that will understand! I can't put in words how I'm feeling right now, once again I'm sitting in self doubt, questioning myself why I'm still breathing I'm so sick and tired of people telling me there's a plan with everything that happens in your life/your time is not His time/be grateful for what you have! I'm grateful that after numerous treatments and operations my cancer is in remission but why do I sit now with a broken mind, messed up, frustrated and angry?

Yesterday my husband and I went to see my psychiatrist silly me, just to be told that I'm still not normal and now I have something new to add to my list I have an obsessive behavior!

I have so much burning scars and what people don't know is that each scar is a reminder of all the 'nice' things people say to me;
Your insane
Your complicated
Your the queen of negativity
Your selfish
Your a bad roll model to your children
Your acting like a child
Your a behavior
Your destroying the people around you
And the list go on and on!

I so badly wanted to burn myself when I got home yesterday because of what was said at the doctors room I felt like crap!! I am like I am because of people