i think it is disturbing because of the lack of control and unpredictablity of it. since i am so inexperienced, i don't know what it really feels like if i am really going to get sick. there is a whole other forum online where emetophobes like myself go to chat, but i get tired of hearing what they say because it makes me worry about stuff i hadn't even thought of. that is why i am here now. a lot of them are really super young too...some are only 12 and they suffer so! it is so sad. i hate it.
not only did my friends move away, but my grandfather, my great aunt and my childhood pet cat died this year as well. this has truly been the worst year ever.

thanks for the hugs