I just wanted to add: when I was dealing with the abandonment of my ex-T, I turned to the psychotherapy forum for help. They were an important part of support that has helped immensely during that time. Some of the things that helped me were people challenging my thoughts or reminding me of DBT skills, as well as, support and encouragement. I think that's where you'll make the biggest difference. When you read someone else's post, remind them of DBT skills. Or offer up your experience. Making your own thread about how people aren't living life to your standard kind of makes me feel like you think you're better than me. People di the best they can, and providing support is what helps the most. Not demanding that we all get a job or go back to school.