no, it's not that.. i understand people get busy, distractde, etc. we all have burdens. What i can't bear is assumptions and "shoulds." End alls and be alls. This is and That is.

i want to explain how wrong assumptions are and why, at least in my own example. But forums are tricky places... one cannot do such things and maintain peace.

it almost makes me laugh but it isn't funny. i want to say so much... but there is no point... no point at all. words words words.

i am reminded of a bible passage, which is ironic considering my lack of religion... about taking care not to complain about the speck in your brother's eye when there is a board in your own.

do i belong here? i don't know. i can't always bite my tongue, not when pushed... oh so many assumptions about so much.

how can i get along? i am generally very peacable and supportive... but what to do or say when pushed is a tricky idea online. i am not good at it. i can cut deep and cleanly with words and it isn't good for me or the community. i have a hard time with replies which require a push back.

maybe this is not the sort of support system i should have. i am so alone at this point. New to the city, few friends so far.. i know more doctors than friends due to medical issues. i had a good support network for my mental health in my last town, now i just have my T.

walking so close to the edge and all anyone has is the hands of others that hold them just far enough from falling.

i don't need "bipolar" support exactly. i just happen to be bipolar and it complicates things. My issues are not related directly to my illness at all really. i sought support for issues around therapy...

...maybe i was wrong?