The word I'm looking for is stronger than 'selfish'... The husband has become an a-hole... He does whatever he wants, then tells me/the family to "deal with it" or "get over it" and then has the nerve to complain that no one appreciates what he does for us. He has become increasingly hostile and nasty and displays no concern for anyones else's needs, feelings or desires. He has alienated the two children, ages 18 and 22 who live away at college, they tell me that they don't want to be around him and make excuses not to come home to visit. I know, not enough information, but wanted to keep it brief. Thanks.