I'm scared of my pdoc appointment. I don't know what is going to happen and nothing seems like it is good. The 2 MAOIs I found out I could get that I did not think were covered are not the ideal meds for me, either one. And I'm not convinced that my current MAOI isn't working; I think my seroquel isn't working and that is leading to depression. But I can't prove that.

I'm always open to new drugs. I have to be because I've run through so many options. But these drugs I do not feel good about.

I am just having a very hard time not knowing what is going to happen aside from a discussion of should I be IP which is probably yes no matter what is done.

I just don't know what to expect and I am afraid of everything I know is a possible option for treatment. I know what my thoughts are at this point but I don't know what my pdoc will think and I can see a few different angles for her.

13.5 hours......