Gostryter, thank you also for the reply. You make a good point about why I should let my h know. When Moodyblu suggested it, I quickly dismissed that avenue. Then you suggested it and it caused me to remind myself how he had been supportive in the past. And an agreement that I signed with my T about such things.
Maybe I can muster the courage to do so.
I'm sorry for being such a bother to everyone. Reaching out may have been a mistake. Sorry.
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 "It is good to have an end to journey toward, but it is the journey that matters in the end.
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