Like most BP, I struggle with who I am now and who I could have been if I hadn't self-destructed so many times in my life. Too many times in recent years, I looked back with too many regrets........or as the Snickers commercial says - "regerts".

At the same time, now I know the story whereas before, I just thought I was a jerk. I have defense mechanisms and ways to deal with the frustration. I was lucky because I'm still in a good enough place to move forward and for that I am thankful.