How strange, when I am depressed, the only thing that soothes me is reading and talking about depression.
Well, sorry for your bad time. Please, try to focus on the intensity of your pain, and use it to gain the awareness that you have right to complain. You are not bothering anyone here, because we all know what it means to feel like that.

If your h gets angry when you are sad, it makes perfectly sense considering the different tendencies to relate that men and women have. A man will likely feel as the breadwinner, and if you suffer he must either DO something to solve the problem right now, or feel a failure. His frustration then converts into anger. Of course he should give up his excessive responsibility, and just listen to you. But it is too difficult for him. The whole thing is explained in Richard O'Connor's "Undoing depression". If you and h would read it, that would help you surely.

The best of luck!