I agree with the last post. As an adult she can have relationship with her stepdad no matter how you feel about him. My ex husband is a lousy husband yet he is a great dad to our daughter. And so on. I have great relationship with my ex's BF's adult kids and its totally nothing to do with my ex. They are adults and want to remain friends with me. I am all for it

There is no need for your daughter to know how stepdad treated you. It's not relevant to her

As about material possessions there is no need to compete. My ex husband is very well off and I am just ok. He buys our daughter things that I cannot afford, he paid her college tuition ( undergrad, she paid grad school herself), he paid for her wedding. He is very wealthy. It's nothing for him. So what! I am actually glad he can do all those things because I cannot! In your situation he is not even bio dad and he does things for her.

I just think you might try finding positives in all this. I hope you can repair the relationship with your daughter

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