Hi nowhere
This seems to be terrible and very painful. I bet your husband has mental health issues on his own. Perhaps if when talking here you try not to talk about him but about you as an individual that would help you a bit for the moment. Like every time you speak you mention him. It is like there is a lot of attachment and we cannot see the person, I mean, you. Now, everything seems to be tangled.
If you could, what would you do now? You do not need to answer my question if you do not want to.
I am sending you a hug