Welcome to Psych Central, Christen. So sorry that you are feeling this way. It's a rotten place to be.

Because you posted in the steps to better self-esteem forum, I'm wondering if you are willing to get to take some steps to work on yourself. A book that helped me when I was at a very low place, and very isolated, was Dr. Clayton E. Tucker-Ladd's book, Psychological Self-Help. It is available free online at http://www.psychologicalselfhelp.org/ and sometimes Dr. Tucker-Ladd posts in the Self-Help forum.

It is full of great approaches and the wise advice that if the first steps one tries don't work, one must keep on going and try other approaches. It also suggests not working on everything we want to change at once, but focusing on manageable goals.

I am glad you are here, and I hope you will find encouragement, ideas, and support that helps.