I go throw a similar thing too. For me, I just dont know how to respond to people queires without a tone of dread and defeat. In some way I feel ashamed and responsible for my mood disorder and personality conflicts. No matter how much you convince I am not the cause of my mental health problems I still feel responsible and ashamed.

It could be the secondary emotions I feel about my mental health issues. So, on top of the health themselves there are emotions about them. I see me (my identity) as the problem.

I am working with a therapist to confront the avoidance issues I have with people. I really am a loner, but it wasnt by nature it was a product of my illness. Maybe you too (if you have the funds) can see a professional to help you cope better.There should be no shame in having a health issues, especially if you are actively treating them.