Hello SaphirBlue: Welcome to PsychCentral! PC is a great place to gain support as well as to acquire information related to mental health concerns. There are many caring members here.

I'm an older person... more than twice your age! But I've lived with what you are dealing with all of my life. So it is all very familiar to me. I won't go into allot of detail here. But I will mention that this is my second time here on PC. A few months ago I became disillusioned with the internet in general & closed all of my sites, including PC. Recently, I downloaded Windows 10 & it sort-of revitalized my interest in being on the web. And as I thought about where I wanted to be, I decided it was here on PC. So here I am. Anyway, as a result of this, I have old posts, here in the Transgender Forum, that I posted when I was here before. They are now attributed to: "Anonymous 100305". So, if you're interested in reading about me, you can go back through the Threads, here in the Transgender Forum, & find those old Threads.

Beyond that, I will just mention that I'm always available to correspond, here on PC, via Personal Message, should you wish to do so. Because of my age, I don't have much familiarity with all of the terminology that exists nowadays to identify the various resting places that exist along the gender-identity continuum, e.g. genderfluid, demi-boy, etc. But, in terms of living a life in two genders, I've been there in spades, as the saying goes. Oh, and by the way, that reminds me. There are a couple of books I could recommend. One is: She's Not There: A Life in Two Genders by Jennifer Finney Boylan. The other is: Wrapped in Blue by Donna Rose. These books are a bit older, at this point. But they both are biographies by individuals who came to confront their gender identity issues as adults, as you are doing. The third book, which you may already be familiar with is, of course: True Selves by Mildred L. Brown & Chloe Ann Rounsley. It has traditionally been the "handbook" trans individuals gave to family members & friends to help them understand what being trans is all about.

My very best wishes to you...