I'm so overly emotional. I drank the pint of rum and it didn't do much cuz of my meds but I'm not going to drink anymore. Cigarettes give me more euphoria and it lasts for hours unfortunately but I'm not going to smoke for a good while.

I become stable and recover pretty quickly now. Talked to my psychologist yesterday on the phone and he said that he could tell how well I was doing just a few seconds in. My dad phoned yesterday as well and observed the same. Just normal yknow..

I'm proud of myself. I feel like I made it by beating anhedonia and being honest about my meds etc and now I take as prescribed and I feel better. I can't believe it. Abilify is amazing. How I survived all these overdoses such as the 90 Klonopins or lethal tylenol overdoses twice because i didn't care and didn't bother to extract and separate it from the codeine and then drinking with it. Idk my liver should be severely damaged but it's not apparently and I'm healthy.

When I get back to that state, I'm contacting my friends on Facebook to hang out or something. I told one friend a while ago that I had a form of schizophrenia before I was diagnosed with paranoid/(disorganized - Not too sure about that anymore. I don't believe that meds can work that well) schizophrenia. He said that it's no problem.

Everyone was so nice to me and wanted to be my friend but I was so so sick.

My psychiatrist said i would be that way forever and I'd have to learn to live with it.

That makes me so mad I'm not even going to think about it I'm moving on...

Btw my eye sight is back and pupils aren't max dialated anymore from the cogentin. It took a while but I don't need reading glasses anymore.