Weekend sucked. Fought with spouse. Did nothing but binge watch TiVo and play games on pad. Seroquel did not knock me out as expected. Was evil mean and cranky all weekend. At this point I am afraid if I even try to explain thoughts and feelings to anyone (spouse, T, PDoc) I will be be locked up again and it has not quite been a year since I was IP for the first time. I have no FMLA left, so cannot be out anyway. I am "safe" but my thoughts are freaking scary crazy to me ... This is how I was a year ago and my spouse thinks I am better?!