Quote:
Originally Posted by marmaduke
Yup, thats what they do to you. A crippling lack of self esteem, lack of confidence, OCD and social anxiety has made my life very difficult.
I always wanted loads of friends, but was too shy to make any.
You sound like a decent person, who has insight into themselves. You are not narcissistic. You may have traits of narcissism learnt behavior but with help, maybe therapy, that can change.
Build your self esteem, you are good enough, you are always good enough.
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Thank you! You're point of view also definitely makes sense too.
I've made an appointment with my therapist again to discuss all this stuff, even though I've long abandoned therapy.
I just wish I can get help somehow so that rejection doesn't shatter my ego like it does, and how I can stop trying to interpret what others are thinking when they say nothing.
It's all stuff my dad does now that I think about it. He always used to throw a tantrum and take you on a guilt trip when you don't do something the way he wants it.
I don't throw tantrums and don't guilt trip people, but I go into a depressive mode each time something doesn't work out for me.
It sounds like I have a really fragile ego, and quite a big one.