because i HATE meditation.

also, i think that any medicine that messes with my seretonin is BAD for me, personally. it seems to alter all my other body functions in really awful kinds of ways. if i had known zyprexa did that i would never have taken it. i feel so stupid. i've felt like crap ever since i took it last week and i collectively only took about 2.5 mg altogether.

i just feel so stupid. i shouldn't cave in to my doctor's drug pushing. i need to get rid of him.