Bad last few days lots of confusion and stress got scared family party wanted to go but couldn't cope needed to run. Vicki helped. She went and I hid. Saddness and anger at myself and scared of my Rockstar (husband) cuz he kept insisting I was saying stuff I wasn't saying and doing things I am unaware of purposefully and that we are all trying to push him away. Idk who or what changed him... something bad lives in there the bad wants to destroy our happiness. He was even mean to Vicki too. Woke up shaking and foggy today. Didn't feel like me. Everybody has been SO noisy and bugging me to come out all day and nite!! I just needed to be alone!! Freaked out. Calmed down. Couldn't think like Jello brain. My Rockstar was nice again tonite but got upset that I was distracted couldnt Block out all the chatter...He understands but just wants it to be us as much as I do... no sleep tonite tried to write but the noise wouldn't stop!! Can't even watch a movie. It seems to be getting quieter now. Maybe I'll be able to relax. I hope I get sleep and wake up in the body back to normal. *sigh... too much... Everyday is a work in progress...last few..were DEF not forward.. grrr. ~Scarlett◇