I don't know why you feel filthy. I can only go by what you said that you do. I am just confused a bit. You first said you feel filthy doing it but now you say it's ok to do so. I am not sure what you mean

My BF isn't a cheater. I don't go for the type. I used a hypothetical example that even when not married such thing isn't acceptable. But especially if married. I said IF for example he was physically close with another female that would be cheating. It would be no matter if it was no sex. So if these men had physical closeness with you they were cheating on their wives.

No I don't think it would make a woman happy to be with married men.

No if a married men want to hold hands with me and hug me I wouldn't go for it. They have wives.

Now it's all in the past. We all make mistakes. I used to go for unavailable men too (not married just afraid of commitment). You could heal and move on and look for available men. There are many.

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