Thanks for all your support. I have connected with my deepest emotions, with some help. I didn't felt happiness or anything like that at all, I felt my grieving, my pain, and how I've been feeling inside for all this years. But even that it wasn't happiness what I felt, at the end I was happy to know how I really felt inside of me. For the first time ever I have been able to feel from the inside. That really explained to me what I want to find from the inside of my mind or hearth.