hi, are you taking anything or talking to anyone? I can't imagine how you must feel and how stressed out your body is carrying that with you. do you have any days where you are ok? and if so what makes the day ok for you? is that something you can hang on to? is it your situational life that makes you unhappy? sometimes people let go and just leave , it's better than the bad end that tempts you. you can always message me too . u have a lot of people that you can talk to here .