First off, it's NOT karma that's causing this.....you have the sinner part wrong also......it's the sinner that doesn't feel bad because they are too caught up in their sins to even realize that they are sinning & wouldn't admit it anyway so obviously they aren't going to feel bad. We are the one left feeling bad because we don't like that the relationship got screwed up by them thinking that there is nothing wrong with what they are doing.....they have rationalized their behavior....but it doesn't make it right. They go on with their happy rationalized life while we do feel bad that we can't go where they are going because of our values.....it's the one that's not sinning that usually gets the hurt feelings when we do hold to our values because we aren't going to get caught up in their sins.

I grew up in an mostly all boy neighborhood. I was as tom boy as you can get & all through school guys I found were better friends than the girls as I just didn't relate to them. I ended up in computer engineering & back in the late 1970's, it was an all guy field so I worked with all guys.

My values were always sex after marriage & ONLY with my husband. One of the engineering positions I had, one of the contractors actually asked me to have an affair with him. We were working friends....I was married at the time & so was he. I had my boundaries & let him know that wasn't going to happen. I didn't know his wife otherwise I'm sure I would have said something to her. He was totally clueless that there was anything wrong with what he was doing & went on his way, looking for someone else I'm sure. My marriage wasn't good & it definitely wasn't that I was happily married......but I was married & those ARE my valued to this day they haven't changed. Yep, I was unhappily still stuck in my bad marriage while he was off having fun with someone who would take him up on having an affair.

I held my values....I WAS NOT the sinner just because I was the unhappy one that was in a bad marriage.

Sin is about a wrong action that you don't feel good about. It has nothing to do with how you are left feeling because like I said, most times the sinner has no concept that his action/behavior is a sin while on the other hand, the person who understand's it's a sin & has to break off the relationship because of the sin is the one left feeling bad about the whole thing even though there is a good feel that we didn't fall for being brought into the sin also.....we should feel good that we were able to keep the boundary secure through temptation.

I have actually had several situations where I was the one holding my boundary secure while the person who was sinning went on happily in their ignorance that there was anything even wrong with what they did or continued to do.

You need to seriously rethink your definitions because they have nothing to do with reality.....as a matter of fact they are almost opposite of reality because like I said, it's the sinner that goes on totally oblivious to their sin so they have no bad feelings at all while the person who ends up holding onto their values & refuses to sin is usually the one that gets hurt & feels bad.