So, I think for the first time in 6 years of countless meetings with mental health professionals, I have found one professional that actually makes a lot of sense. Yes, it helps when they listen but they've never explained my actions/behaviour. My parents didn't understand. But having to explain to my parents are to why I did this and that actually made everyone have a more clear head. He said to me I now need to concentrate on my wellness instead of sacrificing my needs to help everyone else. He is right though, I concentrated on everyone else's problems but mine. Distraction is good but when you don't take care of yourself problems quickly arises. I've ranted amd raved but never truly concentrated on myself. It's hard.