Do you remember the airplane analogy? They always tell parents to give themselves the oxygen first so they'll be ok to take care of the children. Right now you need oxygen. Stop worrying about your sisters kids and what other people can or can't do and take care of you...if that means ip, PHP do it. I know, I sound like a broken record but I'm worried about you too.
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Nammu
…Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here. …...
Desiderata Max Ehrmann
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