I've dealt with depression for a long time now, but I've recently begun to take a spiral. One of my best friends passed away and I moved away from home. The situations themselves where what I thought caused the sudden relapse but I'm not sure. To most people I seem to be very happy and on top of the world, but the truth is the opposite. This past week I haven't even been able to leave my house. I can't sleep when I try, but still spends hours a day in bed. I've attempted suicide before, although I'm not currently at that level. I want to get help but I can barely afford rent. Plus I'm dealing with physical medical issues that drain the rest of my funds. I don't really have any friends right now and the only people I can feel "close" to are usually in a book or on a TV screen. I feel so incredibly alone, but when people try to get close I instinctively push them away. As much as I try to hide it, I'm not okay. And I don't know what to do.