Hi Tammy,
I tried to go on disibility when i was first diagnosed in 2000, and they denied it , so i went back to work after being out for a month or more. I had just had my first manic episode, all with drug and alcohol abuse, acting out, going to jail, crashing my new car. Need i say more about relating to you? I've had some good days and some bad days in the last 7 years. I'm a nurse and i was getting into a lot of trouble calling in to work, getting self destructive, although no one at work knew how bad it was. I finally started working through an agency, meaning that i pick my days to work when they are available, and i cancel when i can't go. i still get into trouble at times with my self destructive behaviuor when manic. I just came out of a rough week, where i did a lot of posting and everyone helped me. i went to work yesterday and did a great job, although i was a little manic. i contacted a disibility lawyer about a month ago. I just didn't think i could keep working. He said to me, "as long as you can work do so, when you can no longer work call me." So i can really relate to you. I feel better about myself, and more productive when i can make it to work.
So, ask yourself:
.How do i feel about not working? would it be a relief? Could i control my disorder better if i wasn't working? is there something i can do, when i'm able to work? Is there something that I can work at from my home?
And then my friend, do what feels right for you. Because it's your life. A lot of people are on disibility, and a lot of people are still working with bipolar. Only you can say what's best for you.
I wish you the best,
dorsey