I think there are two aspects to being a Mom.

There are you children and your relationship to them. This, in my opinion is the only part that's important.

Then there is the role, or job description of being a Mom. The role expected by society. This is the daycare part of being a Mom.

Not all women love that role. Many women prefer to continue working in their careers rather than doing the daycare aspect.

I absolutely loathed that part of it. I hated the whole culture of childcare (playgroups etc)

I was always younger than the other Moms and I was different so I didn't fit in.

I love my kids like crazy and am a devoted and protective Mom. I'm very nurturing.

But..... I found it utterly mind-numbing looking after them when they were younger. I was bored out of my mind for a lot of it. It often felt stifling and it was not a job I enjoyed.

I loved my kids dearly but HATED all of their stupid shows on TV and to this day I cringe when I hear them. I hated playgroups, and was bored with most of the things they wanted to talk about and do when the were little. It's a small, stifling world doing childcare and not everyone finds it fulfilling.

There are women who love it and it seems to be like their calling. I really admire them, but don't think the fact that they enjoy child care automatically makes them better mothers. They love doing it in spite of their kids, and it's always easier to do something you enjoy.

They love the role or the identity of mother and the sense of purpose. They often want more kids because they love it so much. For some women I've known like this, child rearing is also their hobby.

I was not like this and it took tremendous effort for me to do the things that came so naturally to some other people I know.

There were aspects of parenting that I love more than anything else… Cuddling with my kids, hugging them, making them laugh etc. I didn't like playgroups but I took them out into wooded areas and we caught frogs and snakes and took water samples home to look at under the microscope. I loved teaching them things. And when they could talk about things that were also of interest to me it made things much easier.

But talking about Barney, or Sharon Lois and Bram, or Lambkins, Ninja Turtles or Pogs made me want to scream.

Regardless of what type you are, whether you like the job, or whether you don't, it is crucial to have some "me" time.

Even women who don't have mental health issues find the pressure gets to be enormous, and sometimes feel like they lose themselves in their job. It's because they're constantly nurturing and meeting other people's needs, and usually not meeting their own.

There is a tremendous amount of pressure on women to do far too many things. These days I think with "Pinterest Mom" culture it's even worse. Now everything has to be perfect.

So in order to keep looking after these children, I think you need to sit down with your husband and really think about ways that you can meet some of your needs. It's easy to get lost in that job and completely lose site of yourself.

But to keep doing it you need to care for yourself...

(((((((Hug))))))))