5 year anniversary of my marriage ending today, which was also when I lost the hope that things might turn out ok for me after all. We would have been together 19 years if we were still together, and i was 19 when we met. So that was literally a lifetime ago. I had more energy to self destruct back then, but also believed somewhere inside that i would outgrow my problems and be a normal adult. 5 years today. I'm on track in some areas, doing great in some areas, but i'm so lonely. I'm sitting at home crying. Nobody sees this side of me.

I realized today that he cut me out of his life to give himself a chance at something better, and i think he's found it. Honestly i'm happy for him, because i still love him i guess, but i'm so sad for myself.

Why does time go so fast on the good days, and so slow on the bad days?