Hello, I'm new to this thread/group. I am 40 years old I have been recently diagnosed with Bipolar II, trying new meds. I have always had problems dealing with people socially, and it is all catching up to me now. Latuda is making me feel crazy (er), and I don't know if I will have a job when I return to work next week. This is my 4th job in less than 4 years. So much going on....so angry, so sad, so hopeless. My anger is out of control. (Latuda 40mg, Lamictal 25mg, Paxil 20 mg)

Anger:
Blank mind, cloudy vision
the satisfying crack of collision
from an elbow swung, or punch thrown
and in my ears, a buzzing drone

I breathe deeply, and start to think
of how I was pushed, to the brink
I really do regret it now
I'd fix it but, I don't know how

But it feels so good, at the time
but the mind is doing it, it isn't mine
It's not the nice, sweet child
with polite voice, and manners mild

But which am I and which is me?
Which one of those am I going to be?
The child, who's weak, yet nice?
Or the monster, nobody crosses twice?